Welcome Back - roller coaster months

Piggies's adventure: let's fly with all my nakamas. :D

Do you know why I was away from this "diary" for so long? I bet your first thought is "you broke up what" Well, I can't say you are totally wrong but I can only give you a B- for this guess. The truth is.. I have started my Master's in Counselling a year ago, it has been a crazy roller coaster life after then. Sigh, I have never expected taking a Master can be this exhausting. Argh!

Juggling work and study is TOUGH, see that block letters? It is really T.O.U.G.H. I am sure I am good in managing my time, all I can say is.. I picked the "coldest" subject. It was tough to get proper agency to do practicum. Trust me, I called all agencies which I could get from google, and NONE of them willing to take a F.R.E.E Labour! Come on peeps.. I am FREE! and I am a good worker tooooooooooo! *like I could say this to their faces* 

Eventually, I am now with 2 organizations that help refugees, looking to join the 3rd (not excited at all). I was -------------------------------------------- this happy when 1st organization accepted me as a intern-counsellor. But, but.. I only get 1 client in 5 months! I was totally a free labour there, they only assign all toils/administration/paper work for me. And now, my supervisor is leaving that org, hence.. I will stop my service there. Oh well.. I became 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- this upset. 

Honestly, you might be hoping that I can tell you fun stories, crazy people I met during my sessions. But NO WAY~! Confidential ok.. Muahah.. not interesting anyway. 

Doing this practicum has basically reduced my interest and passion towards counselling, maybe Malaysia is not a good place to practice yet. I feel demoralized more than anything else. Uhhh... tired. I went for 2nd org today, but there was no one.. I was just babysitting the kids. I dragged myself back from there after 1.30pm, and took a long nap.. I haven't had "good" sleep for so many months. 

Working 7 days a week can kill you! Or.. at least your cells. Enough complaining~ the only song that cheers me up recently is "Good Life - One Republic". Let's whistle *wee wee wee*

Alright! My brain just went in to sleep mode. I need to lie down and try-not-to-think-of-anything at all. Hope you have been doing well!!!! Just hang in there, your effort will pay-pay-ay-ay-ay~ What is there to complain about? =)

Talk soon! 

Life = Drama

Life fun fact # 1

You know what.. I really think that John Grey is right, especially the book he wrote, don't tell me you have never heard of it! I know the cover is a bit lame, bright pink and white! Sooo pro-woman, isn't it? bit of gender biased there! Ha, I am quite a smart ass eh! You might not believe it, but I am !! :D

Alright, back to story.. I know it's Christmas night~ no one will be here clicking.. anyway!

Life fun fact # 2

I am sure every single human who is breathing now has have this experience more than 1 time: "yelling, frowning, shouting, going mad, cursing, crying, laughing out bitterly.... to the computer screen". DON'T TELL ME YOU HAVE NOT ~!! I won't believe you.

Life fun fact # 3

Do you love cute stuff ?! just like how my favorite (actually, one of my favourites) cartoon Sin Chan. He adopted Shiro (lil white) and began to take care of it.



Sometimes, he just held Shiro soooo tight until it fainted or visualized stars ~*~*~* Well.. I don't think he just loves to hold Shiro, if you have watched this cartoon, you probably will do the same! Why? Cause Shiro is like cotton candy, you would just want to feel how soft it is~ Umm.. just like when you see a bubble, you want to pop it ! make sense right?



Life fun fact # 4

Sometimes, I like to sit and watch from my room's window.. Nah, it's not like the view is breathtaking, it never is! Lots of annoying neighbors, old folks. But look up higher, I can see the clear, dark navy blue sky.. maybe if you could remove the lamppost for me it would be perfect.



Life fun fact # 5

It's just amazing that after looking up to the sky, cold cold air is sometimes brought into the lung and filled it with warmth and determination: Ganbate.. Whoa! look, I am saying something meaningful here! I couldn't stand to give myself a pat on shoulder now "hmm~ quite philosophical today huh!"



Life fun fact #6

TO BE CONTINUE - THE PLAN? YOU NEVER KNOW ! Just keep walking and playing~

Life fun fact # 7

Life is like drama, but there isn't a script for it, too bad!!! It will just play by itself when you take the next step, even you choose to stay stagnant, it will still play. Maybe your audience will fall asleep as your screen hang there! Oh yea.. I have a story to share here:



There were few poisonous email exchanging from my world with another corner of the planet.. (same planet of coz !) Guess the e-postman was on leave one day, one mail went missing. Mr. A didn't receive any reply while Ms. B was waiting there.. and decision was made with misunderstanding.. neither of them knew..

Like a show right?! old school show !

The truth finally revealed one day, unfortunately/fortunately.. It was already too late.



Life fun fact # 8

People always say that "hey! be nice, be polite, be considerate." I don't deny that, that's pretty useful when I need a favor. BUT ! I have to admit that there are times, you just need to be not-polite, not-considerate, not-nice. It helps one to let out all the underlying feelings, it also helps another to have a hard knock on head to wake up.



Life fun fact # 9

It is always good to sleep early.. I think I am running out of fun facts today. HOHO ~
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE : )

Wish you all have a wonderful night and get ready for the new year. I'll miss you 2010.

17. 12. 10 1.09 am

It has been a chilly day.

I sneeze, since I woke up and even now.

It is a cold cold night, it makes me wonder: we have winter too!

It's late now and certainly, it is unusual that I am still awake. I can't sleep..

I don't feel sleepy at all.

*hu..h* a long warm air passes my nostril. What's on my mind?

I don't know.

There were some automatic self-talk, I try to stop it somehow.

But my mind is still pondering on. What now?

Cold Cold Night.

信。

我不奢求你去相信，我真的不想你再那么折磨，你不应该是那只可怜的小狗。。 无法让你自由的呼吸， 我心很痛。。 也了解你值得拥有更美好的一切。这一次的告别是真的想把你放开。。

飞吧。。 4 年的捆绑真的不好过， 我没有什么可以再为你做了。。 这是我最后可以给你的。。

希望你可以简简单单的读这些话，我没有隐藏其他的意思。真的。

你一定要过得比以前更快乐，好好努力向梦想前进，珍惜家人和朋友。

加油.

An Odd Queer with the Revolist

Mission to be diligent !

Right, I think I have not told you yet.. that I have found a job! Woo hoo~!! I shall be reporting to work on Wednesday. Soooon! So soooooon~!! Can hardly wait *honestly* What worries me now is my study.. Hmm~ Will I able to cope it? I guess I can :D



Counting down the days and chapters to cover, I have loads to read according to the study guide!!! And I have an ambitious aim --- To read ahead the guide ! (clap clap) So this was what indeed happened....

Concentrated. Focused. Couldn't be more!

It was really interesting to read about cognition, behavior and emotions. Technically my process should be good without any distraction. Umm.. well.. How should I put it?? There was a book there - colorful, comical, hilarious, great artworks... awesome (enough!) It looked more appealing than the one I was holding - Black and White. Tried not to look at it.. disregard ed the temptation! HA!
I failed~


I don't think anyone in this world can resist!

I didn't realize how much time had passed while I was enjoying Eiichida's artworks. But I can assure you that I did not spend long time on it. Yupe, only like.. 10 mins? Unfortunately, my clock ticks faster than my *mental clock* ~


Making Up ~~!!

Frenziedly turned my attention back to the text book, and I successfully read a few pages without peeping at other temptations. It was pretty enjoyable~ Either I'd spent too much time operating my brain usage or the skills provided in text are just too effective. I fell asleep half way during Topic "Relaxation"....

ZZZZZzzzzzzzz.....

So I think, it's not my fault~ haha :D

Con.fess.ion.

You know what?! I nearly started this new post with "Dear Diary." !! It must be a kind of side effect of AFB - Away from Blog

It's been almost three months since I came to Sg. I was so eager to leave my previous job and pumped up with ridiculous adrenaline when I received the Master's offer. *pretentious* Without planning nor thinking carefully, I quit and believing that I will definitely get a job here. And the truth shows that I might be wrong..

Why would I take up the course? Aiming to get better offer with NGOs, utilize my skills to serve uprooted or unfortunate ones. * Serious? Applause *

Spent around 1 month looking websites, agency, clicking all possible jobs - from psychology related to training, to customer service, to even sales. No decent calls nor interview receive until now. Positive energy? dropped acutely from cliff to well.

Still no getting any better, but I am betting my life on this. I hope I will not lose this battle and new day is coming. Not sure whether my 1st step was wrong, I have to keep going until the end tells.

Camera isn't with me, so no photos will be added ! Too bad.. :p

Well I do have a funny thing to tell!! I just permed my hair recently, is slight curl now~ My best friends were glad and they loved it .. * how flattered *

But when the photo was posted in my FB, a friend of mine said I look like 30 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! * how depressed *
GOSH! I was awfully offended and hurted! hahahah! Even though I know I do not look like 30 (right?) Yet, I am just a poor little SHALLOW woman!

30 ~ come on, be mercy. hahaha~ Well, I don't mind to look like now when I turn 30 ;)
I'll still be gorgeous like a Mark St-Clair once said " you look gorgeous now, you will look gorgeous even when you are 40".

Life is tough! But I just have to keep Smiling! Maybe when this sh*t ends, I will be proud that I have added another interesting page of adventure to my life!

Up or Down. It's just life. CHEERS MATES / FOLKS~ :D

Pray you read happily, pray you have a good day ahead my dear friends